Sea Men

My dear friend sent me a link to check out. Her description was "Inspirational Cook Book". Damn, I thought, some other bitches beat us to it. 
I opened the link.
I kid you not. A Bona (pardon the pun) fide book called:


Natural Harvest - A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes

It would seem that here there are no options to spit or swallow. 

I opened the preview, the dedication reads: To all my friends who helped with the recipes and taste tests.

A gasp escaped my mouth. Now I am no prude. But. I certainly hope that the donors were not the self same tasters, if you get what I'm saying.

And another question flying about my head is - can you whisk it to make a souffle? I suppose I'd have to buy the book to find out. And how much semen would you need per recipe? Do they have group masturbatory sessions for quantity? 

Or is it a salt substitute? 

Woman: "Honey, this isn't salty enough!" 

Man: "Don't fear my love, I'll just whip out my willy and give you a little sprinkling. Salty enough?"

She goes on to say that we humans are omnivores - that we'll eat just about everything. 

That semen is not only nutritious, but it has a palatable texture and wonderful cooking properties.

All I can think is that she had to have been as high as a kite when she imagined this book. Post reefer munchies. 

Woman: "Damn there's nothing to eat in this house. I've always wondered .... (fill in the gaps)"

And so Woman frisked the willy. Whipped the wondrous ejaculate. Made a sandwich, or delicately balanced it on top of ice cream. The possibilities are limitless really. 

The point is. She ate it for nutritional prospects.  And it certainly sounds far too measured to evoke pleasure images. Almost like calculating your tax. 

The Woman. The Willy. The eternal envy. 

Coming soon...

Love Sam

xoxo